I think I have just gotten over the 'being in trouble part'. I did not feel bad at 10 miles.
We were supposed to do 18 miles. I just stopped at 17.5 miles. My legs could not carry me any further. I was completely fatigued out. I was fine till mile-13 and this was my first long run wherein I did not take a walking break till mile-13. Even after that short walking break, I was okay for another 1.5 miles. But after that it was like I had no energy left. I was completely fatigued out. I ran into Amol and another friend SK (they were on bikes) at mile 14.5 and had more water and a gu gel. But it did nothing for me. I knew that I had just another 3.5 miles more.....but they felt like forever. I kept breaking into run-jog-walks. It was horrible and my legs felt completely disconnected from my body. They felt like jelly and each step felt like I would wobble over and fall. Amol was with me the whole time and he could clearly see my plight. And then at mile 17.5, I could not go any further. I knew that I had just another 0.5 miles to go.....but my mind gave up on me that day. First my calves, then my soles, then my back and knees and finally my mind. It could not edge my body to go on. In retrospect, I am so angry with myself for not finishing the last 0.5 miles!
The good part:
- I did not break into a walk till mile 13. That is such a major improvement for me.
- At least I ran as much as I had run last week.
- Recovery was real good this time. After the run, I went home and had an ice-cold water bath. In the evening I stretched again and used the foam roller. Sunday morning I repeated the stretch and foam roller exercises and was out and active the whole day. Monday morning I could even go for a short 3 mile run. The ice, foam roller and regular stretching really helps.
- I gave up.
- I did not finish 18 miles.
- Did I mention....I gave up!
Anjali, you shouldn't beat yourself up like this! You did great! Running 13 mi without a single walk break is NOT an easy task. You could have easily done the 0.5 mi had you taken as many breaks as the rest of us did. I think you didn't fail on #18 but you are failing on #10!
ReplyDeleteBe positive girl - don't look at the 0.5 miles you didn't run - look at the 17.5 miles that you did complete.
ReplyDeleteAlso such experiences are good - as they give you a good assessment of where you are and what more you need to do...
Sharmila (meena for you...)
keep going sis - enjoy the journey - do not let such small hick ups bother you too much...
Wish I was there...with you...now...I remember your first day at school - I was there along with aai...
Hey Anjali! it is so inspiring that you are ran such a long way and had only 0.5 miles left but that still means so much to you..it clearly shows your dedication to the whole endeavor!! Keep up the great work! you should definitely not call it a failure but a huge accomplishment!!
ReplyDelete@ ketki, I managed to catch up with all of you at mile 11 and 12 just cause I did not take walking breaks.
ReplyDelete@ Meena, thanks so much....all of your support keeps me going.
Run .. walk ... crawl it does not matter. Will yourself through the distance during training. Race day you will run, fly and soar no matter what. And hey, it is these hard runs that make you strong and ready for the race. Here is an inspiring quote for you. I gave this to Ketki a while back.
ReplyDelete"Out of the silver heat mirage she ran. The sky burned, and under her the paving was a black mirror reflecting sun-fire. Sweat sprayed her skin with each foot strike so that she ran in a hot mist of her own creation. With each slap on the softened asphalt, her soles absorbed heat that rose through her arches and ankles and the stems of her shins. It was a carnival of pain, but she loved each stride because running distilled her to her essence and the heat hastened this distillation.
- James Tabor, from "The Runner," a short story.
Thanks so much Priya!
ReplyDeleteSK....you and Ketki are such a big support for me during this training. I cannot thank you guys enough.